Me, Jac and Laura
20, 21 and 22 respectively. Which is rather odd, considering our personality differences, I should probably be in the middle. And hey, look! I’m still young!
Jac, being all of 21, lives with her parents, attends university like any regular Singaporean. She spends impulsively on any Disney merchandise she gets her hands on, and is on fantastic terms with her mother. She’s very sociable, although with a tendency to avoid confrontations, always looking for some middle ground.
Laura, being 22, has been living away from her parents for a good time now, and now lives with her fiancee. She’s very prudent in spending her money (Disneyworld in 2009!) and her relationship with her parents can only be described as grueling. She’s quick to point out teh st00pid, and isn’t a quick OMG LET’S PRANCE AMONG THE DAISIES.
Me, on the other hand, was forcibly extracted from my home. I attend university like any regular Singaporean. I spend rarely, although when I do, it’s usually in enormous amounts of money. My relationship with my parents… well, I suppose we could have been closer. It’s neither close nor completely removed. I wouldn’t characterize myself as direct as Laura, but I’m neither one to make lots of friends.
This really caught me in thinking about adolescence (which is a course I LOVE, thanks to the professor). There are 4 types of self-concept: identity diffusion, identity achievement, psychosocial moratorium and identity foreclosure.
Jac’s clearly in the identity diffusion stage - she doesn’t quite have an identity crisis, and I (from what I see) she hasn’t really thought about what she’d want to be in the future. It’s always the ‘here and now, and take what I can get’. I think it was the shopping sprees that really gave me the indication that she’s still in this stage.
Laura, I suppose, is pretty much in the identity achievement stage. She’s got a stable relationship, and she does know who and what she is. She knows where her talents and limits lie. Theoretically, she should be the happiest out of all of us. ^__^
Me? I think I’m in the psychosocial moratorium stage, where I’m just dreaming about infinite possibilities to the future. I’m not quite ready to close doors yet. I dunno, I suppose I was forced to grow up when I wound up having to depend on myself for everything. I would’ve probably stayed in the diffusion stage if not for having to be forcibly be confronted with all these issues I never quite thought about.
So… there you have it. The three of us in a guessing nutshell. All adolescents, one way or another. If I got you wrong, feel free to give me a slap and yell OMG HOW COULD YOU GENERALIZE ME THAT WAY?
(For some reason, my LJ posts won’t show up on flists. I’ve checked the filter and the backdate option, and they’re all good. =\ Oh well.)
Psychos: A True Story.
For a couple of months now, I’ve had the misfortune to listen to a couple arguing right outside the stairwell. My apartment and the stairwell is separated by a single brick wall, so I managed to catch whole phrases of their argument, especially when they were screaming at each other. But last night was seriously freaky.
Apparently Girl had come back to see her Guy, and asked for closure or just someone to shift the blame to. At the beginning, I caught snippets of Girl saying ‘what did you just call me? You so did not call me a bitch!’ (this is a phrase oft-repeated in their previous arguments). The moment where the shit hit the fan was when the Guy bellowed ‘YOU LEFT ME! YOU FUCKING CUNT!’ He proceeded to either throw things around or just hit the wall, and my wall was pretty subject to much abuse.
And I don’t know what happened, but then the Girl was suddenly screaming and crying, and she was yelling ‘let me go!’ and ’stop!’ You and I can clearly infer what the Guy was doing to her. I’ve heard similar phrases before, but they were yelled when I was nowhere near a lucid state (because their arguments seem to always happen at 4 in the morning). She was screaming for the good part of 5 minutes, and I became very disturbed. I wound up calling the landlord’s assistant, and at 1am in the morning, he didn’t pick up. I left a message, and then wondered if I should call the police. I didn’t dare peek my head out of my apartment, because I knew the Guy was abusive, and I honestly didn’t want to get hurt.
The screaming stopped, and there was a bit of silence for a while. Then the Girl began to alternate between ‘I love you’, ‘I hate you’ and ‘Asshole’ while speaking to her Guy. I then caught the gist of what was happening. The two broke up, and the Girl wants to get back together again, and the Guy didn’t want to. The Girl began to babble things hysterically: ‘What I am supposed to do?! You’ve left me here and I don’t know what I’m supposed to do!’, ‘I love you and you don’t love me, and I don’t know what to do!’
Guy still refused to get back together, and then the girl said ‘Fuck you. You’ll never find a girl like me who would love you as much as I ever will.’ I had half expected her to flounce dramatically out of the building after uttering such pretentious words, but Christ, she still stayed.
There was more talking, and I couldn’t hear much. The Girl then told the Guy: ‘You are abusive.’ Guy mumbles incoherently, and Girl reaffirms what I’ve thought all along. There was more talking, and after some time, I think she presented a suggestion to the Guy. I didn’t hear what it was, but the Guy bellowed again: ‘ARE YOU KIDDING ME? FUCK THIS SHIT. GET OUT!’
And that was it. I think they took it to the parking lot, and I heard a motorcycle zoom away.
Question: Next time I hear an argument like this and she’s in definite pain, should I be calling the police? It’s clearly a lover’s quarrel, and I don’t know if the police solve things like that.
I find it baffling why this girl still wants to stay in the relationship when she already knows her boyfriend is abusive. The guy obviously refused to get back with her, and I don’t know why she wants to tear herself up over a man who hits her when he’s angry. No, his aggressiveness will not be healed by the power of love, so stop trying to be a martyr. Everyone knows that she’s better off without him, and assuming if what the Guy said was correct and the girl left him, the girl knew too. Then she comes crawling back? Christ.
Secondly, get this guy to a counselor. If he abuses women, he’s got some fucking problems.
Psychos.
Psychology should be a subject made mandatory at birth, so everyone will know how much of a dumbass they look when they start backpedaling (the scientific word is cognitive dissonance, I believe).
On another note, I want to take Philosophy. I’m absolutely fascinated with logical fallacies. It is awesome. Shall grab a book to read.
PS3 Warranty
I was reading the fine print off the warranty for the PS3 today when this tickled me:
THIS WARRANTY SHALL NOT APPLY IF THIS PRODUCT… (D) IS DAMAGED BY ACTS OF GOD, MISUSE, ABUSE, NEGLIGENCE, ACCIDENT, WEAR AND TEAR, UNREASONABLE USE, OR BY OTHER CAUSES UNRELATED TO DEFECTIVE MATERIALS OR WORKMANSHIP
God has a vendetta against PS3s! Sony knows it!
Default Mode Still Dysfunctional.
I have been positively miserable over the past two weeks. I don’t know what triggered this, but I am seriously desperate to get out of this slump soon.
Today was an incredibly bad day. I forgot to print out a paper due today, so I had to rush home, upload the paper to my account, rush back to school, print it out and then go for class, all within a half hour gap. I skipped my 7.30 math class because I was busy crying until 3am last night for no apparent reason.
I slept through three full classes today. I am either that tired, or that depressed that I can’t be bothered. And as usual, I want to go home.
My PS3 got bricked about 5 minutes ago. I don’t know if it’s overheated or what (have you seen the number of vents located on that thing?) because I placed it too near to the TV and it blocked one of the air vents or whatever. When I start it up it gives me garbage on the TV. I’m giving it another half hour before I ask for an exchange from the guy.
I’m feeling extremely anxious and depressed. I think partially because it’s only a day left and the bids on my Sony MiniDV handycam isn’t as high as I’d like it to be. I was hoping that selling the handycam might offset the cost of the PS3 completely. I’ve made a tidy profit selling off my Wacom 4×6 (my cousins apparently had loads of unused Wacoms sitting around the house, so they gave one to me) and I was hoping that the Wacom would pay for my future PS3 games. I seriously don’t want to make a $350 loss on my handycam. I’d rather keep it myself.
I have two motherfucking long papers to write, and a Psychology midterm coming up on Thursday. The week after that would be yet another Psych midterm and another one after that. Christ. I suppose it’s really my fault for stocking up on so many courses, but even if I dropped Film Studies I’d still have no time. I’ve spent the least time on Film Studies - it’s the Psych courses that are killing me.
I’ve learned my lesson and reverted back to 20 credit hours. Taking the Holocaust, Statistics, Abnormal Psych and Language Endangerment/Death. I’ve also made a point to check ratemyprofessors.com to get more interesting teachers this time.
Loneliness
It just does things to you.
I can’t keep up anymore.
